Human Tendency Is To Stay The Same

    The structure of personality tends to stay in place and heavily influence our lives for several reasons. We mostly respond to life events habitually. This is known as conditioned response, and we do it because it is easy and the outcome is predictable. We are pain avoidant, and whenever we have to undergo a transformational change of body, mind, emotions or habits, it hurts to do so, and this we do not want. Lastly, getting validation for our self-image (how we perceive ourselves) is a large factor in our staying identified with our personality and not moving beyond this evolutionary form.

    1. Conditioning

    The main way we move our energy through our physical aspect is in a conditioned way, which we previously learned through thought, feeling and action. Rarely do we question that there might be another possibility, and thus we are mostly acting like programmed robots. Conditioned behavior partly results from our duality organization of our body and brain and our tendency to avoid change, which is painful. The other reason is a lack of information about our personality and higher-self, which we do not have because we have not asked about it. There is much information available, but first we must ask the question to receive the answer. The longer we stay the same, the harder it becomes to change ourselves because of our increased rigidity, reduced vibration and low awareness level and the quicker we age and decline.

    2. Pain Avoidance

    We are pain avoidant and understandably so. The survival strategies of the personality developed in our earliest years were done to help ourselves survive and protect us from pain. These were useful strategies then, but eventually this protection mechanism will cause more harm than good. We have difficulty to break our habit of pain avoidance, because the habit is so deeply ingrained and such a familiar part of ourselves.

    A child will hurt their leg and limp to protect the leg so they will not feel more pain. The limping behavior can go on long after the leg has healed. The limping can become a habit, and delay and prevent healing of the leg. As the leg heals, pain will be felt due to the tissues repairing, which can reinforce the limping behavior. When we mentally and physically try to protect an injured area with the intent to avoid pain, what we are doing is not allowing energy to enter that area. Energy needs to get into this area to heal it. When tissues heal, transformational pain will be felt. For more information about transformational pain, see Chapter 4. Eventually the leg is healed, but it may not have been restored to the prior vitality and balance if the child limped. Energy will find a path to get to the leg to heal and maintain it, but it will not be the ideal path. When young, the leg is in a growing process and can become deformed, shortened or out of alignment with the hip socket, which in turn will affect the feet, ankles, knees, spine, shoulders and skull alignment.

    The child can still fear hurting the leg and the limping can continue subtly long after the leg has healed. A simple protection strategy like this can stay in place after an injury well into the adult years, and can remain for a lifetime. This proactive stance is then an unconscious habit and is blocking energy flow to that area. Later on, problems will happen in that area or in related areas, because energy was not allowed to penetrate and heal the area. Much later in life, problems will develop along a line in the body related to the old injury site.

    Another experience many of us have is a traumatic experience of being harmed by another human, usually related to the first sexual encounters. This often causes us to create an invisible armor protecting the chest, buttocks or genital areas, depending on where the damage was experienced as most painful. These experiences are harmful because large areas of the body can be walled off, and are typically close to the spine, resulting in reduced flows of energy along the spine. This type of energy block often has a huge emotional component as well, so the defense system in the body often has trapped emotional energy related to the site of injury.

    With traumatic events such as rape, beatings, or severe injury, there is a large energetic impact of being hit or hurt by the other object as well a strong emotional component. That area of the body is mentally walled off to suppress the memory so the person does not have to recall the horror of that experience. This kind of protection serves well in the initial stages after an event like this, to keep our sanity, heal and return to normal. However, rarely do we ever drop this defense because the memory is suppressed and eventually it becomes very problematic, resulting in mental or emotional dysfunction. We can understand that defense systems are in place to protect us from pain. Transformational pain is a symptom of the healing process and to heal we need to accept the pain, which is counterintuitive.

    When an old emotion is recalled, we can bawl like a baby for days on end. This hurts like hell, but it is healing as old pent-up emotion is released through crying. When we cut our finger, our nervous system detects it has happened, and we quickly withdraw our finger away from the knife. We see the blood and know we are cut, and then we feel the pain. This pain is not from the cut, that we did not feel, the nervous system reaction was automatic. The pain we feel is from an intense energy localizing by the cut, to repair the tissues, the pain we feel is the heat and fire of the transformation. This experience does not have to be experienced as painful, once we understand what is going on. We can detach and observe the feeling occurring in our finger, and we will not have the experience of pain. Instead, we will observe the sensation of tissues repairing and of an energetic vibration working strongly in the area.

    If we have severely injured a limb, and it has been in a cast and has taken a long time to heal, then it will take even more energy and pain to restore it to the flexibility it once had. As the limb is healing, adhesions and scar tissue develop and the muscle fibers become weak from nonuse. The first time we stretch the limb it hurts like hell. This is transformational pain, it results from intense energy going into the tissues and starting to remove the energy blocks and open and heal the limb. It takes much energy to open a broken ankle or hipbone, the pain is proportional to what is needed to heal it.

    If our desire is strong enough, we will rehabilitate the leg and be willing to go through the transformational pain required to get what we want. After we begin this healing process, we may see the truth that we can get through this kind of pain and not experience it as painful. We look deeper and understand this pain comes from our mental resistance to accept the healing energy and to become one with it. When we resist the healing process, it is more painful and prolonged. Resistance takes energy. The less we resist the faster we heal. The more transformational pain we are willing to endure, the more we heal.

    These words can be misunderstood. I am NOT saying that pain should be sought, nor self-inflicted, or that pain has to be our experience. With advanced stages of self-realization, you can go beyond having the experience of pain as tissues are mending and transforming.

    3. Validation Of Personality

    Validation is probably the most important reason that the structure of personality is so persistent and difficult to go beyond. We have two main ways to get validation for our self-image. Self-image refers to how we perceive ourselves, how we perceive people and how the outside world perceives us. We have an image we hold in our mind about who we are and how we behave; it is the essence of what is meant by ‘me’.

    This topic is difficult to discuss because I know many will not understand what I am saying. If what is written is misunderstood, it is because we are still under the influence of perceiving the world through the validation structure of the personality, which primarily happens in the mind. This message is difficult to get through, because the mind filters out what the self does not want to know. To understand it clearly, would be the beginning of the end of the illusion currently operating.

    The illusion in operation is that we believe who we are is the mind-voice and the emotional energetic charge generated from the internal story we are constantly weaving with our mind-chatter. Mind-chatter is a constant dialogue we make with our thoughts, about everything that is occurring to us. We chatter and give opinions about everything that occurs all day. We know no other world than this. We have no idea what is meant by clear sight or seeing reality, because we are essentially living internally in our mind and think we see. This state has been described by mystics as blind, asleep, clouded by a veil, in the dark, or not awake. Unfortunately, reading about it does not open the eyes, but I will try again to make it clear.

    This illusion and the belief that we are the mind-voice gets constantly reinforced in the outside world by us deliberating provoking the outside world, to give us the reason to react back with strong emotional energy. We are constantly looking for reasons to react so we can build a strong energetic emotional charge, so we can feel ourselves as strong energy. The stronger the energy we can build up, the more alive we feel. Our main motivation for doing this is it serves as a kind of entertainment and it makes us feel alive, even if the energy we generate is not pleasant. That is the game played by the personality, and as personalities are getting bigger today, there is more energy to put behind our response and thus the game is increasingly harmful to everyone and everything. If we take an honest look, we cannot deny that there is an escalation of violence, chaos, destruction, destitution and harm increasing all over the world today. The longer we stay immersed in this illusion and game, and if enough people do not go beyond it, it is sure to get worse as time goes by.

    The stronger we react to something that happens, the more alive we feel, and the more it reinforces the belief that the entity we are operating through is in fact real. Personalities love drama and seek it. Drama is the fuel that keeps the reactive cycle going. We need to get validation for our self-image, which we do by creating drama. That is the way that that this illusion continues. The illusion will stop, when we see through the illusion, and realize that we are ‘pretending'. Then we can learn to divert energy from the old way of responding, whenever we observe we are starting to stir up trouble. We stir up trouble, by pushing the button of another or by creating a drama situation.

    We each have a positive and negative reaction pattern that we use to respond to events in our life to get validation for our self-image and keep the illusion going. Both of these responses happen constantly and automatically in varying degrees of intensity. Before we know about our programmed aspects, we have no idea we are responding in an autopilot way to many of life’s events.

    The positive response is about getting validation for our self-image and the negative response happens when we do not get validation for our self-image. When we are operating entirely under the influence of the personality, then our actions are mostly driven by the need to reinforce an existing attribute or to get a new attribute as a property that helps reinforce our idea of self. Personalities are never satisfied with what they own, they always need more of whatever substance is valuable to them, this fact keeps us always focused on the better days ahead. It is a rare person who gives something without wanting something in return. As most people do not even know they are in the illusion, then they are not aware of their hidden agenda. We think we are generous, but we are not aware that we are greedy. We are blind to our motives, while operating under the blinder of the personality.

    We are happy if we get what we want, and stay happy and always are asking for validation of what we believe we are. The more you give people validation the happier you keep them and the more stuck you keep them in their illusion. If you want to help people, tell them how they are, but that is dangerous to do. When we do not get what we want from the outside world, either in material or from other’s approval, then our pain response comes. Each individual has their own type of pain response, and some of them are violent. If there is a strong response, either positive or negative, it is normal that we will act to reinforce our concepts and belief system by getting more attributes. For instance, if we no longer can get confirmation, we can fall into a depression and think about what else we might need to do. We dream up another concept to try in the outside world, thinking we are changing ourselves by doing something different. However, what we are doing is adding on another layer of programming and making the illusion that much stronger. This is how it goes and sadly, some people continue like this their entire life and never see beyond the veil blinding them. Okay, this is probably more than you want to know, so I will move on to the next topic. I hope that I have not lost your attention here. This topic can be difficult to read, because it does not give validation like ‘the personality’ is seeking, and we can get a strong reaction when reading it. If this is the first time, you have encountered this topic, it can feel unknown and scary, and you might even get the feeling to close or burn this book, to get away from it as fast as possible. If you are feeling this, take a deep breath, relax and go on to the next topic.

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    About the Author

    betsy027ms MARY E. (BETSY) RABYOR was born in Wisconsin and lived in Nevada, Florida and Spain. She went to college and was a computer programmer for 17 years, with family and suburban life. Since 1990, she has meditated and learned self-healing techniques. In August of 1999, she spiritually awakened, quit her job and devoted her life to self-realization and helping others. Shortly after starting Reiki self-healing in 2005, her kundalini unexpectedly awakened. She continues to work with her kundalini transformation today. She lives in Wisconsin and is a skilled distance healer, author, poet, intuitive, and spiritual mentor.

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