Chapter 9: Full-Blown Kundalini Transformation
Prologue To The Journal
After the full-blown kundalini triggered, I was given instructions as teachings, dreams, visions and insights about how to raise my energy so the transformation was effective. At first, the vibration is low, the body does not move much spontaneously, and I relied heavily on the techniques. Each day the vibration in the body gets higher. As the vibration rises, higher-self takes over stronger and the techniques are needed less. Kundalini transformation then takes on a life of its own.
It helps to understand my journal by knowing about my sessions. A kundalini session is a time where I was meditative and surrendered control of my body and allowed any reaction to happen. On average, sessions were ninety minutes long. From the beginning, I understood I did not have to figure out what to do. I only had to follow my higher-self. When I quieted my mind, and merged into the vibration, my body would move spontaneously. At first, it moved a little, later it moved much more. The transformation work going on in my body determined what kind of session I had. Sometimes the energy was calm and I meditated, watching the reactions in the body that were either freefall or the growing phase. When I moved, I named the session according to the main position my body was in the duration of the session. I would choose my start position depending on where energy worked to make it more effective. The sessions naturally evolved out of the activation pattern of the body and my increasing awareness. In the beginning, sessions would concentrate on one body area and over time would work the entire body from toes to head, in lying or sitting positions.
I had the prevailing belief the transformation would finish soon. This belief kept me going full-time for three and a half years, always with the hope to finish and see the result. I had the savings to live on and the space to do it, so that is what I did. Other people in kundalini transformation may not notice the observations I did, because they were not dedicating as many hours to it and thus have lower vibration. I worked with this full-time averaging twelve hours each day, and kept a high energetic vibration. I do not feel this dedication is necessary or even desirable, as you cannot live a normal life! I think a benefit of my doing it like this, is I have these detailed notes that I can share with others. After my savings ran out, I went back to work and reduced my sessions to two per day. The kundalini reactions tapered when I cut back, but my vibration continues to rise daily.
Another prevailing belief was I thought I was transforming into a male. For many of my notes, this belief biases my observation of what is happening. Today, I believe most of it was due to interpretation, but as this process is not finished, I am not certain. It is strange this happens so late in my life. I wonder what benefit it has for humanity and our continued existence as a species. I can understand the benefits for the individual but not for the whole. How is enlightenment passed to future generations? Perhaps by becoming enlightened, a change will happen to the global consciousness and it may have an effect energetically. Maybe kundalini transformation will start earlier in each generation, and eventually it happens to young adults who then can pass it along in the genes. Maybe it is a onetime thing that has to be done by everyone in his or her last physical life on Earth. Maybe it happens to all people in a short period, like a species wide metamorphosis. Maybe the only value is when a person goes through it then they can write about it and encourage or help others.
I still have many unanswered questions and until my transformation finishes I cannot answer them. I am not attached to any result and am sure I will love the result. I want it to be clear that what is written herein is not necessarily, what I believe today and I am not seeking approval for any of my theories. I am interested in the truth and can let go of my current theory when something better comes along.
Acupressure On Meridians
January 3, 2006: Copper Ring Bracelets
I felt I needed more energy and Chinese meridians kept coming to me, which I knew nothing about. Finally, I looked up the meridian charts in the Internet and printed them. A meridian is an energy pathway in acupuncture and Chinese medicine. The Chinese call the energy chi that concentrates and moves along these paths in the body. The fourteen main meridians are the lung (LU), heart (HT), pericardium (PC), triple heater (TH), small intestine (SI), large intestine (LI), spleen (SP), kidney (KD), liver (LV), gallbladder (GB), urinary bladder (UB), stomach (ST), conception vessel (CV) and governing vessel (GV) meridians. Along each meridian are spots called acupoints, marked and labeled in meridian charts. On the acupoints, you can excite energy flow in the meridian either by using slight pressure with your fingertips (acupressure) or by using an acupuncture needle. Many acupoints can be felt as a light pulse once you are accustomed to feeling energy. The meridian charts I like are from YinYangHouse.com and can be printed online.
This is what I needed. Using Reiki with acupressure is stronger than only Reiki. I started sessions by intoning the Reiki symbols and did acupressure on various acupoints. Today, I felt angry and noticed how energy was building in my muscles all over. I started with the liver meridian because I heard it is related to anger. I used acupressure with Reiki on the liver meridian and see the area inside my knees is blocked. While feeling my anger, I used acupressure on the liver meridian acupoints by the knees. I felt my leg meridian open and bliss drew me more than anger. I still wanted to think and be angry, so I sat with the emotion feeling it wherever it was.
During the treatment, I felt much tension in the back of my neck near C7 and the right shoulder. I continued until the tension and anger dissolved, which took about forty minutes. I still feel some tension and anger. I think my shoulder tension is related to how I express anger, which I have been doing for years. Reiki with acupressure is a way to heal this. I am looking for a quick way to discharge my anger before it builds too high. I think to do a body scan and note where energy does not flow or where there is pain. I think to feel around to find those acupoints and write them down. I have to work on my reactive tendency. I do provoke and then people respond and I am caught in the ping-pong game. I talk too much and do not listen well nor feel the other’s energy. I aim to keep a keen eye on my body tension, so I am aware when the mind-voice is too active.
I am very sensitive to energy now, maybe because I am wearing copper ring bracelets I made. I went outside and felt an energy vortex everywhere on top of the hill where I live. The source of the strong energy in my room comes up through the floor from this vortex. Before, I thought it was coming from the potbelly stove. The tree mystery is solved; the strong energy comes through the ground from the roots. I will check out these things more. Many insights come now.
January 4: Body Scan Checking Meridians
I spent time with each meridian experimenting with using acupressure on each acupoint along the path. I would see if it was open or closed and what affects I felt in the body by applying acupressure to that point. Details of these notes are in my Reiki healing journal. I worked with the liver, gallbladder and urinary bladder meridians.
January 7: Liver Meridian Experimentation
I experimented with acupoints on the liver meridian for a long time and noted the effect of each point. The most significant thing I noticed is the LV1 acupoint at end of long toe were effective to activate the entire meridian. I observed how energy opened higher in the body as I moved along the meridian. My sinuses opened and my nose cleared. The liver and gallbladder meridians had similar side effects and I think they must connect. I discovered that treating the same meridian on both sides of my body at once was stronger than doing one side of my body. I discovered that working acupoints on either side of an energy block was effective to open the blocked area. I spent a long time working on opening various blocked acupoints. Then I thought, instead of working every acupoint on a meridian it may be more effective to find my main energy blocks and work to clear them. When I stopped, my liver and spleen were tingling strongly. I think this is good for all the organs.